How to Improve Interpersonal Communication Skills – And Why It’s Worth It
Orange County Christian Counseling
Our ability as humans to function and exist in the world depends on our ability to communicate. We make sense of the world by gathering and decimating information; we understand who we are and who others are via communication. Interpersonal communication becomes our medium of understanding the world and how we interact with it outside ourselves.
Principles Of Good Communication Skills
Understanding and improving interpersonal skills will start with understanding the guiding principles. This will also help reinforce how interpersonal communication skills are a must-have in all settings and all human interactions, whether professional or personal.
Unavoidable We are always communicating, even when we think we are not. It is impossible not to communicate. Therefore, everything we do in social and professional settings must be curated to communicate the message we want to be received by others.
Irreversible Once a message has been communicated and received, it cannot be undone. The expression that says, “I cannot unsee that,” better captures how impossible it is to take back what has been communicated. It, therefore, becomes important for us to think before we speak or send a message out because once it has been received and perceived, that cannot be undone.
Complicated Interpersonal communication involves multiple factors that make it more complicated. Each message is sent and received within a context that includes different personalities, perspectives, and cultural and personal preferences.
Understanding that interpersonal communication is complicated will help us approach any situation with understanding and patience, which will make it easier to avoid or work through misunderstandings.
Contextual When it comes to interpersonal skills, understanding that different contexts require different methods of communication is vital. Context can consist of the mood of the group, cultural make-up, level of maturity, and emotional state of those one is talking to.
Context will shape not only what is communicated, but how it is communicated. The implication of this will be that we need to have the ability to ‘read the room’ so that our communication is effective and, most of all, does not offend anyone unintentionally.
Why Are Interpersonal Communication Skills Important
Having the ability to communicate effectively can be viewed as a superpower. It will open doors that other virtues might not. Being a great communicator means one can see people, anticipate their needs, and act accordingly. Success in our personal and professional lives can be tied to our ability to navigate the world of communication with intention and expertise.
Good interpersonal communication skills are not something people are born with. We all need to learn it. From learning language and the use of words in said language to understanding non-verbal cues and tapping into our emotional intelligence, it all can be taught and learned.
Whether someone is a natural-born introvert or extrovert, interpersonal communication skills, like any other skills that are taught and applied correctly, can be a huge asset. Below are some reasons why this skill is not merely one of those soft skills people do not concern themselves about, but one that can elevate one’s life and experience of the world:
Understanding of the world Only through communication with others and our engagement with the world can we get to understand it and our place in it. Interpersonal skills allow us to disseminate information, share our ideas, and present our opinions, and it allows us to do the same for others. This way, we can co-exist with empathy and understanding.
Builds Trust Through interpersonal communication, we can get to know someone. By communicating effectively and authentically, people can trust you and know who you truly are.
This can also be true in organizations and families. When those in leadership communicate effectively and give room for others to be heard, it builds rapport and trust, which are key to building and maintaining healthy relationships.
Boosts general well-being Whether it is communicating our boundaries or letting people know how much we love and appreciate them; effective communication skills help boost our well-being.
When we create an environment through the way we communicate, which fosters people to be heard and for you to be heard, it creates room for meaningful connections that are essential to our emotional and mental wellness.
Personal and Professional Success we are constantly in contact with people both in our professional and personal lives. To succeed in these two areas, the ability to communicate effectively can be that channel.
When one communicates well, it means that they are equipped to deal with conflict in a respectful and understanding manner, they can articulate their ideas and opinions with clarity, and they listen well. Listening well means one can create safe spaces for honesty and feedback.
Impact and Influence A huge part of interpersonal skills, whether written or spoken, is the ability to impact and influence others. No matter who we are or what stage of our lives we are in, we are always graced with the opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life.
This can be through being a loving parent, a present and attentive teacher or coach, an empathetic romantic partner, or a valuable co-worker or boss. How we communicate with others is important if we intend to leave a lasting impact.
Avoid hurt and Misunderstandings The famous American writer and Poet Maya Angelou is quoted to have said. “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Dealing with people can be a delicate endeavor. Knowing what to say and how to say it can be important in making sure that we do not offend or hurt those we are communicating with.
This does not mean that conflict will not arise, it just means that with effective interpersonal communication skills, one can avoid unintentionally leaving others, especially those you love, feeling hurt or misunderstood.
How to Improve Interpersonal Communication Skills
The art of improving any skill in one’s life is acknowledging that one needs help. Many of us feel like we know how to communicate, and to some extent, that may be true. However, we live in a constantly evolving world, and communication, just like in many areas of our lives, keeps changing, and we all have to be up to date. For this reason, for a person to improve their communication, they have to be adaptable and flexible.
Empathy in communication gives the ability to listen without judgment, even when one disagrees. Empathy means one leaves room for more viewpoints to co-exist without feeling like one’s point of view is the only one.
When one builds on empathy, one creates a space where every voice is heard, including their own. Knowing that one’s voice matters as much as the voices of others will give confidence to the speaker.
Improving one’s emotional and relational intelligence as it pertains to interpersonal communication skills is vital. Emotional intelligence means knowing and understanding one’s emotions and those of others around.
Emotional Intelligence assists in reading the room and context to communicate effectively and with understanding. Relational intelligence is the ability to know how to relate to others but also understand the relational dynamics of those one is communicating to and with.
Interpersonal communication involves not only others listening to you, but you also have to know how to listen to others. Being skilled in active listening can elevate the ability to communicate effectively.
Active listening means you are fully present to hear what the other person has to say. This can be done by handling all the “noise” or anything that might hinder your interaction.
When a person is talking, if need be, asking questions for clarification or showing with your body language that you are present with them encourages them to talk more freely as they feel that they are being heard. Active listening gives dignity to the speaker and enhances understanding for the listener.
We Can Help
It can be daunting to know where to start when needing to improve one’s communication skills. If you would like assistance in this regard, please reach out to us. We can help guide you in understanding how you communicate and equip you with the techniques and knowledge you need.
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